How do you know if your brand’s tone of voice is hitting the mark?

A few months ago I was looking for a business coach, I signed up to a newsletter for this group coaching program run by this very charismatic brand founder who had shrewdly scaled her business without hiring any new employees or slogging away into the early hours. I was really impressed by her and felt very inspired. She now teaches a similar business model to others, which seemed perfect – what she was offering completely aligned with what I was looking for, so I tentatively dropped my email in the pop-up that appeared on her website. I got a few emails featuring videos and blog snippets but hadn’t quite yet gotten around to arranging a discovery call. 

Soon another email dropped into my inbox. The subject line:
“Are you ghosting me, Viola?” Erm, excuse me?

Now, her brand was based in NYC, and the tone of voice was very a direct and punchy “New Yorker” style, which I initially liked, but I found this level of punchy soon became off putting. As someone who doesn’t like confrontation (and who also had to deal with a stalker in my early 20s), getting this blunt, accusatory question in the subject line sent my brain into fight-or-flight mode! I understand chaser emails are necessary – company newsletters aren’t just there to solely provide value but also to sell – but to me this tone of voice just didn’t land right. It felt passive-aggressive even though I’m sure that wasn’t the sender’s intention. Inside the email was no better, it simply said “Did life get in the way? It’s not to late to sign up for my course." I promptly unsubscribed – I still respect the person in question and might still take that course at a later date, but I certainly didn’t want to receive any more emails like that.

Others have had similar issues with brands missing the mark. My journalist friend Jo Hoare recently wrote a piece for Grazia on how “opt-out” marketing emails for occasions like Father’s Day in a faux-sympathetic tone of voice just made her grief worse than actually getting the emails to begin with. She said she had received “One from a posh ready meal brand, one from a laundry delivery company and one from an e-learning course. Now I might not have had a dad for a couple of decades but even I’m pretty sure that frozen lasagne, a duvet deep clean and six weeks to master SEO isn’t what most men are hoping to open come June the 16th.” 

It’s quite understandable if you’re a gift shop or a floristry brand who might send out quite a few emails for Father’s Day or Mother’s Day – I believe it was Interflora who first started the “opt-out” emails and the company was rightly applauded for it. But if something isn’t relevant to your brand, there’s no point just hopping on a bandwagon because other brands are doing it. The tone of voice just sounds insincere and hollow (plus getting potential customers to think of dead loved ones isn’t exactly going to put them in the mood to buy from you).

Making sure your tone of voice hits the mark isn’t just about getting to know your customers – it’s finding the right balance with how you speak to them. Sensitive language is great, but overly sensitive and it just sounds annoying and insincere. Punchy and energetic is good but not to the point where it sounds like you’re yelling at someone who took your parking space.


If you want to learn how to refine your brand's tone of voice and keep your customers engaged, my "Copy Cut n’ Blow-dry" and "Full Head of Highlights" packages are designed just for that. Reach out to me at the email below to book a call and discover more.

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How to connect with a digital-savvy audience by mastering your tone of voice

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Why so many brands are turning customers off (and how not to)